 I often get phone calls from parents or spouses who are having serious problems in their home. Most of the time they talk about how long the problem has been going on and, sometimes, it has been an issue for months or, even, years. They will talk about how much they need to make a change, that they can't keep going on the way things are - the kids are out of control or in trouble, their marriage is holding on by a thread - and, yet, they sometimes still fail to commit to even coming in for a consultation - a free consultation, by the way. So, what holds them back? They are obviously in pain and looking at escalating problems they they have determined they have no solutions for. There is no obligation to come and talk to me to see if I can help them or, at least, point them to some resources that may be a better solution for them. But, they still hesitate. It's puzzling. Or, maybe it's not. I've found that one of most difficult things for humans to commit to is change. Even if it is positive change - something that will definitely benefit them. Think about how many times you may have decided to start on an exercise program. You know it will help you improve your health, you know you will feel better after you do it, you may even lose weight and look better! But, you hesitate - because committing to change is hard. So, I wait. Many times, that person I spoke with who never made an appointment will call me again. Sometimes it is 6 months later, sometimes a year later or more. Now, they REALLY need help - things have gotten much worse and they are desperate. I wonder how long they would wait if they had a toothache? Would they wait 3 weeks, 3 months, before going to see the dentist? Probably not. What if they had a backache? Would they wait 6 months or a year before going to see a doctor or a chiropractor? Probably not. Why? Because they are in pain and want to end the pain as soon as possible! But, emotional pain can be much worse. And it doesn't only affect one person, but the whole family. And still, they wait. Research shows that couples in crisis wait an average of seven YEARS before seeking help for a deteriorating marriage. There are no studies about how long families wait before seeking out help, but often, it doesn't happen until after a divorce has taken place, the kids are acting out and are now in serious trouble with the law, failing out of school, or hurting themselves in some way. If you are feeling stress around parenting, your relationship with your spouse or significant other, or other family issues - don't wait. The sooner you ask for help the sooner you can find REAL solutions to turn your family around. Call today for a free consultaiton. You won't regret it! 408-786-1070 |
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